I am a yo-yo.

My mind cant decide.

Yesterday was a bad day. I agreed with the decision to come home Oct and was glad I had the ticket to urge me on. At work I feel like a circus monkey. People are all eager to talk to 'the gaijin' to hear her speak their tongue in a strange accent with strange grammar, and then hear her speak her native language, asking her to say random words, such as 'Scissors', 'Table', 'Sausages', 'Classroom', 'Moustache'.... etc. I wonder what will happned when the glitter will wear off. What then? My future is in London, why waste time huh?

Today was a good day. I regretted changing my ticket home. I wish I had longer here - and I can if I change it back, even though it costs a further 5000yen, it would be worth it, I dont want to return home to have regrets. This opportunity is only here once. I should stay. I can improove me Japanese at work, and spend more time with friends here. My future may be in London, but whats the rush?

As I say, Im a yo-yo. Tomorrow will be a 'go home Oct' day. As for Sunday, Im sure you get the picture.

Wish I did.

Right now, I think the urge to stay is greater than the one to leave, due to the fear of regrets. Ive told everyone Im gonna leave though.... chotto hazukashii yo. (My IME has died)


0 件のコメント: